Five reasons why your motivation letter doesn’t deliver

22 February 2019

By Anisa Pinatih

Some of my students are now living their dreams in Europe and other parts of the world. They sent me a thank you email for editing their motivation letters, but to be honest, they should take all the credit. All I ever did was check the presentation. Content-wise, they had more than enough achievement to showcase in their letter.

But not everyone is like them: chairman of this, winner of that, perfect GPA, and the future shines bright. In my workshops on motivation letter writing, students struggle to see their worth, so they are not confident to apply for exchange programs, scholarships, youth development forums and the like. That said, if they think harder, they can present themselves better than they ever imagine.

The standard approach is making a list of situational questions and then brainstorming ideas. Most of the time, we have the answer to every question, but because our mind is cluttered, it’s hard to retrieve the information. But before preparing for the answers, check some possible reasons why your motivation letter doesn’t deliver below.

Reason #1: You’re a square peg in a round hole

Research the target audience of the scholarship in question. Foreign government sponsorships usually look for mid-career professionals in strategic positions. They don’t look for fresh graduates because they aim to strengthen bilateral relationships. If you’re a fresh graduate without prior work experience, you’re a square peg in a round hole. Find other scholarships that consider academic achievement instead.

The next consideration is whether the program prioritizes extensive organizational experience, leadership qualities, or academic competence. See also their area of priority. One program might prefer STEM to social science graduates.

Reason #2: You tell but you don’t show

Don’t just tell and expect people to take your word for it. When someone says, “I am really good at fundraising, and I am also very creative”, it’s probably hard for you to believe it. Give examples to show your qualities, such as, “During the second year of my study, I led a fundraising project for XXX disaster relief. We used the power of hashtags for the campaign and successfully collected YYY amount of donations from ZZZ.”

Reason #3: You don’t give credit to people

Most scholarships are looking for an emerging leader or at least a good team player. Acknowledge that you didn’t do it by yourself because no leader takes all the credit. For example, you can replace the I with we, such as, “During the second year of my study, I participated in disaster relief in XXX. My team was in charge of the fundraising. We collected donations from students and the general public. My task was to identify the most immediate needs in each refugee camp...”

Reason #4: You only talk about your professional achievement

In a workshop, a student asked, “But I don’t have the certificate to prove it.” even though he did do it. Our culture is obsessed with documentation and sociological artefacts. If there is no official stamp, then it didn’t happen. However, scholarship selection committees are experienced in identifying people, so you should mention it as long as it is true. If they need more proof, they will ask in the interview.

Then another student asked, “But I’m not a leader in my organization. How can I show that I have the qualities?”

Students often fail to see that learning management, problem-solving and other leadership qualities can also be reflected in their non-academic life. I asked them if they had overcome difficulties, such as financial issues, the fear of speaking in public, or personal problems. They came up with equally incredible stories.

Reason #5: You don’t use hedging

Hedging in academic writing is to be tentative and non-committal to avoid making claims that are too bold. A logical fallacy in academic writing has much to do with hedging language. This is a problem in motivation letter writing too. For example, someone wrote, “My initiative made people realize the importance of…”. What about something like, “My initiative has raised awareness of the importance of….”

Ok so that’s pretty much it. One thing to note though, despite all these tips on motivation letter writing, there is one thing that holds the most importance: the grit and perseverance. I can say a lot about the writing part, but at the end of the day, it’s the grit that’s going to help you succeed.